Nikushimi is the greatest thing to ever happen to MFG, the intarwebz, or the entire world for that matter. One day he will become Admin IRL and ban everyone.
A legendary beast of raw, unbridled win, Nikushimi is one of the most veteran members on MFG and a universal symbol of the board's populace, as well as a Moderator of the board's RPG section. He initially began as yet another cookie-cutter Broly fanboy until his exposure to Itachi, which somehow warped him into the creature he is today. Throughout the duration of his existence, his exact identity has remained a mystery, though on more than one occasion he has been referred to by the name "John." On other certain occasions, members such as Kei have referred to him as "John Chang", though this is pending verification. Beyond that, little to nothing is known about his personal life, and MFG has yet to see an image of him IRL.
Nikushimi is what some might call "a raving azn fanboy with Itachi's cock up his ass." But for those who aren't shitwads and actually know the guy, they would admit that he is THE motherfucking Itachi fan. For most of his time on MFG, Nikushimi has whittled away the hours and whatever life he may or may not have blathering endlessly about the fictional Narutu: Sand Ninjaz character Uchiha Itachi. Much of his psychotic ranting indulges in the concept that Itachi is superior to everything that draws breath (or doesn't, for that matter). This has been the center of his focus for some time now, and many are at wit's end over it. Nikushimi spends most of his outside life walking around his neighborhood, mumbling to himself. If his eye should catch a rock, one might hear him spout something like "Itachi could TOTALLY crush that fucking rock..."
Itachi vs. All
Perhaps the most recognizable facet of Nikushimi's existence is the endless and seemingly pointless crusade of Itachiism he seems to be inclined to spread. Since the fateful day his eyes met the Sharingan of this winful BAMF, Nikushimi has taken it upon himself to show the world just how great Itachi really is. Below are a list of key battles that have taken place during these crusades:
- Itachi vs. Vegeto- One of the most gigantic debates in the history of MFG. The topic extended nearly fifty or so pages and engulfed the entire DBZ section during the time when it was active.
- Itachi vs. Alakazam- An infamous clash between Nikushimi and Island of 1,000 Condiments. After an endless and sloppy argument revolving around game mechanics, Nikushimi yielded to Island on the premise of not being knowledgeable enough to argue the material.
- Itachi vs. Ganondorf- Similar to Itachi vs. Alakazam. Niku was bested by Island due to a lack of knowledge on the subject.
- Itachi vs. Claymore- Varying matches were discussed, and though Island once more participated on the side of active resistance, Nikushimi prevailed and the topic has not been touched since.
- Itachi vs. Broly- Lawlbrawl designed by Nikushimi himself to flamebait the growing Brolyfan problem. Rather hypocritical, considering Niku's former fanbase.
- Itachi vs. Anything- Topic for universal Itachi matches designated by Punxx after the numerous Itachi versus threads started to become a problem. It died after fifty pages of epic debating and was recreated recently as a new thread by Nikushimi himself to reexamine old arguments.
- Itachi vs. Bleach- A more recent battle waged between Nikushimi and Island of 1,000 Condiments, with moderate participation from Masked_Felix. Niku managed to steal the win by forcing Island into a dead-end of logic, in which Island's opinion became void due to self-conflicting rules.
Below are the various names, nicknames, and shortened names by which Nikushimi has been known since July of 2004:
- Ultimatesaiyajin (JC)
- Jerbil Cronk
- Jet Coolade
- John Chang
- Lord Nikushimi Itachi-sama
Nikushimi's time has largely been spent in the Naruto, Fan Fiction, RPG, and Lounge sections of the board. He has written a few mediocre fan fics and one or two pretty good ones, but little can be said of him in that area thus far. In the RPG, he is regarded as one of the most ruthless, obsessive, and corner-cutting members of all time, so much so that he has been compared to PyroBastard on more than one occasion. The majority of Niku's time nowadays is spent either in the Naruto section arguing about some Itachi-related thing, or in the Lounge's Gas Chamber, pumping out post after post of unintelligible banter. It is rumored that one can summon him to their location at any time by posting about Itachi. Many chants have been attempted to renounce him (such as Nekoshimi, John Chang, and Nikachu) but, unfortunately, none have succeeded.
Nikushimi, while having once had more rep than anyone, now pales in comparison to Tyrant. He is trying to surpass him.
It's generally disagreed whether Nikushimi can be considered good or bad. Many people are annoyed by his antics, while a seemingly larger portion of the users seem to embrace him and find amusement in the things he does. Everyone will admit, regardless, that he flirts with the carefully-drawn line too often. In spite of this, he has managed to gain a rather large cult following of his own, many of them rumored to be extremely young Narutufags. His legendary status and flooding charisma ensare all who coexist alongside him.
Nikushimi has laid out a few very basic, yet very profound statements regarding his goals for the future on MFG:
- Pierce the IRL heavens with his drill.
- Prove that Itachi>all and defend it to the bitter end.
- Achieve uncontested Rep God status.
- Find a worthy successor to continue his Itachi-centric legacy and surpass him.
- Many have attempted a translation, but none have conclusively produced an exact interpretation of his exact words: "ADMIN TURNING I???"
Final Thoughts by the Members
Nikushimi is really just a self-loving member. His only following is a bunch of fresh meat morons who have pretty much zero impact on any community they grace with their irritating presence. They are about as important as a Dancer to a party trying to take on Thanatos.
Aside from the self-sucking, Nikushimi is, in general, pretty much only knowledgeable about anime he enjoys; all subjects outside of the anime he likes might as well be in some long-forgotten language, like Pig Latin. He claims to be up-to-date on all things internet, but showed how little he knows by failing to understand a term that could easily be associated with him (furry). In spite of this, it is interesting how self ego boosting has warranted him fame, power, and what might be considered success. And weather you like him or not, he's no novice in the battle ring of the RPG or on the debate stage of Naruto.
Long-story short, if you interact with Nikushimi at all, do it by constantly insulting him and his tiny following of dumbdumbs. It makes for great lulz.
In 2009 Niku finally left. Much Baaaawing ensued and he was missed by Most. Farewell Niku.
Nikushimi's idol. Itachi is a character in the animu and mango called "Narutu: Sand Ninjaz", and the brother of Uchiha Sasuke, who has apparently become the main character and is unkillable due to plot shielding. Itachi is held with the utmost admiration and respect by Nikushimi, and any word said against him is taken with extreme offense. Nikushimi makes a habit of declaring that Itachi is better than everything.
Nikushimi's Crusades of Hatred
Seeing Itachi's godly status challenged too often, Nikushimi vowed to become his arms and legs and to spread his Gospel of Hatred. Thus Niku quests from topic to topic, board to board, trying to prove that Itachi is the greatest. Most of these crusades have taken place on MFG, though Nikushimi has recently taken the fight to NarutoFan. After a few months, he managed to establish Itachi superiority as the new dogma there, virtually eradicating all JiraiyaFan opposition. The only obstacle that remains is Pein, but few will challenge Niku anymore. Some people are annoyed and even a bit worried by his actions, since it's gotten to the point where he can just stroll into a topic and post some paragraph about the various ways Itachi would bludgeon/impale/slash/what have you the enemy in question with his cock.
The Gospel of Hatred
The dogma of Itachiism, written by the prophet Nikushimi as the law by which all true followers of Itachi must abide. The principles it dictates are as follows:
- Thou shalt have no other favorite character before Itachi.
- Thou shalt not love.
- Thou shalt not hold Itachi weaker than anyone.
- Thou shalt refer to Itachi as "King Itachi" or "Itachi-sama."
- Thou shalt reciteth the Prayer of Hatred in victory over an opponent: "You are weak. Why are you so weak? Because you lack...hatred..."
- Thou shalt mindlessly spam topics with Itachi-related tangents, even when they are not called for at all.
- Thou shalt overuse the ":zaru" emoticon and its variations, whether you are on NarutoFan or not.
- Thou shalt always assume Itachi to be the victor in versus threads, even when you don't know who the other person is.
- Thou shalt hold thy head up high and proclaim thy status as Itachi's disciple to the whole world, and ask them where their God is now.
- Thou shalt defend Itachi's honor at every turn.
It's canon fact that Itachi's eyesight has deteriorated, and Itachi's brother, Sasuke, stated that blindness was the ultimate fate to which all Mangekyou users are condemned. Itachi confirmed this. The only remedy is to snatch the eyes of another Mangekyou user and use them as replacements, which will result in the birth of a new "Eternal Mangekyou Sharingan." At the moment, however, Itachi has the shitty normal Mangekyou Sharingan, and can't see shit cap'n. This has led to a whole new venue of lulz.
Nikushimi has been involved with various memes and has pretty much used them to death. He generally tends to recycle memes that are relatively old and stopped being funny a long time ago, and does so to the extent that they become irritating. This is one of the main reasons why he is disliked.
Nikushimi's most infamous and favorite phrase. He's abused it more than anyone, like ever. It was actually banned from use on MFG.
You lack hatred...
An Itachi-based meme. This has also become a nuissance, since he manages to twist it around to fit every discussion he encounters.
ADMIN TURNING I???
One of several memes he picked up from NarutoFan. This meme uses jumbled text to convey random thoughts. It was originally used by sexin-the-Konoha on NF as part of the "Yamato Wood" meme sub-genre. It's exact meaning or purpose is not known, other than the obvious requesting of adminship.
Like just about everyone, Niku was obsessed with this meme at one point in time- unfortunately, long after it was funny.
SUCK MY COCK HOT WOMAN!!!
Another Yamato Wood meme used by sexin-the-Konoha. It is a literal meme that orders the person in question to perform oral sex on the one saying the phrase. Sometimes, "HOT KURENAI" or "HOT KONAN", or other variations, are used in place of "HOT WOMAN."
Yet another NF meme. This one involves a cylindrical container advertised at the top of the pages on NF, as well as the hilarious expression of the man holding it. Such edits including Sasuke's severed head in place of the Wustenrot container have made for an extension upon this seemingly unexceptional meme.
And ANOTHER NF meme. This was originally determined by Team GB to be the velocity of Gai's kicks. Nikushimi has used and abused it pretty mercilessly, and now its most common association is the speed at which Itachi can slash his cock through an opponent.
A meme Nikushimi started, usually involving Itachi, whereby the enemy is snapped in twain with a swipe of the cock. Variations include thrusting, smashing, catapulting, etc.
Itachi takes this with one blow!
Inspired by Kamina's GAR, Nikushimi uses this meme to express unbending superiority in any versus thread involving Itachi.
Favorite Animu And Mango
Nikushimi has a very small repertoire of animu. While many believe this has limited his horizons significantly, it can't be denied that he's an expert among experts when it comes to the few that he enjoys. Some may consider him a bit obsessive in that aspect, but Nikushimi's only statement in response to that was "They're weak."
Narutu: Sand Ninjaz
Also called "Naruto", the series derives its name from a lulzy mispronunciation made by a newscaster during a report on the death of a little boy who drowned in a sand box trying to immitate Gaara. Since then, it has been more in-style to call it by this name, rather than the original. This is the series to which many of Niku's favorite characters belong, among them Itachi himself.
Nikushimi isn't all that into Bleach. He reads and watches it when he's in the mood, but is never overly eager to see more of it. He seems to be a fan of Nnoitora, and has been severely "butthurt" ever since Nnoitora's defeat at the hands of Kenpachi and a bad excuse of a plot device called "Kendo."
Death Note is Nikushimi's favorite series. He believes it is flawless and can be seen quoting it more often than not. He also seems to draw some vague connection between the series' protagonist Yagami Light and Uchiha Itachi of Naruto. Niku's favorite characters in this series are Light, L, Near, and Mello; it's uncertain who he likes the most, because he's constantly changing his mind between the four.
Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann
A hot-blooded, epic, and monstrously-gar series about mecha, tits, epic speeches, and giant drills. Pretty much a match made in heaven. Niku is the Glorious Bacon of Light that introduced this series into MFG's mainstream Watch List (much to the disgust of forum regular Shirogetsu). It is this series from which his avatar is derived. He was introduced to the series by raving Kamina fanboys and soon became one himself. It's rumored that on one occasion, he stated Kamina was about Itachi's level in terms of character win. This was completely unheard of up until that time, and still remains yet to be seen again. Kamina is the only character besides Light who Niku would even mention in the same SENTENCE as Itachi (unless it involved Itachi maiming them in some fashion with his cock).
Hated Animu And Mango
Nikushimi, being the hateful person that he is, hates several animus and mangos. Among them, these stand out:
Nikushimi, while unloving of the fanservice, CLAMP art, or Shirley, has still promised Felix that he would give this animu another shot. Reluctantly, of course.
After being exposed to a single mango scan of Berserk in which it appears that the singer from Killswitch Engage is sodomizing a young boy, Nikushimi has vowed never to touch this series again. Ever.
Shit sux. Crappy character designs, horribly unfunny, lacks hatred, etc. Nikushimi just has no respect for this series.
The thing to realize and predict the characters Nikushimi likes, are to go find the ones that suddenly die, or show symptoms of doing so in the future. This is the connecting link between all of his favorite characters. They are also characters who are (arguably) extremely noble and acted as martyrs in their respective series.
Uchiha Itachi, Naruto
Died in a fight with his little brother. Niku is in permanent denial and expects him to turn up alive somehow.
L Lawliet, Death Note
Died at the hands of Rem as part of Yagami Light's evil plot. Niku was very sad when this happened.
Yagami Light, Death Note
Died when Ryuk wrote his name in the Death Note. Light had things going for him and was ruling the world as both Kira AND L, but he met his end when he was exposed at Near's warehouse and failed to kill him because of a screw-up made by Mikami.
Kamina, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann
Dies after an epic, hot-blooded, and gar battle with the Beastmen. Nikushimi was so butthurt over this, he almost stopped watching the series. Almost.
Nikushimi has found his successor, a member of NF who is called "Vergil." Not much information is known at this point, but Nikushimi has made it clear that this person will come to MFG at some point.
The End of Nikushimi
As of 1/28/09, Nikushimi is no more. Having turned 18, he has gone out into the world to achieve things. Whether or not this is the last that is ever seen of him, no one can say.
The Return of Nikushimi
Nikushimi stepped out his lurking shadows, and returned to end the long heated debate of The Gloved One troll that appeared on MFG in late April 2009.